i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
