yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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