THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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