normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
