Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
