Me too!
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
