My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
