all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
