god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize