Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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