shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
