I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
hell yes lets make some ravioli
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
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