Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
