So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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