Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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