he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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