Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
