Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Even my vagina gasped.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
