I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I need moral support for this bender
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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