I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
