this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize
