Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
