But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
