we're blogging at a bar
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
