You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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