i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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