Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
