very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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