sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize