i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
