I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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