We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
