When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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