I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
