Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
