Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
you inspire me to be a worse person
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
