We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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