Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
