whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I need a burrito and a hug.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
