I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize