I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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