whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
