I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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