no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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