Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Randomize