He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
