Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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