did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize