Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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