You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Randomize
