do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
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