I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
